Comments for CouplesNotes

Comment on Another Quick Communication Fix by Ora Green

Ora Green — Wed, 27 Oct 2010 03:36:28 +0000

Good evening, I am engaged to a man for almost 5 years and I don’t know if I am still in love with him anymore to marry him. I believe because we have a 5 year old daughter together and I don’t want her to grow up without him so I stay. We have went for the second time to get our marriage license and I don’t even think we will ever get married, he is constantly coming up with excuses and then when I say that I am not happy I am leaving, he then says “come on and let’s get married”. I am so confused, I want to marry him, then I don’t want to marry him. When we’re around one another he does things to irritate me and I even think I hate him but then there are times that I miss him so much and I want him with me; I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

Comment on Is Porn Harmful to Your Relationship? by Irene Savarese

Irene Savarese — Wed, 06 Oct 2010 12:51:06 +0000

Merry, I really like your blog. This post about pornography helps me understand the struggle some couples that I see have.
I will subscribe to your blog for more information.
Thanks, Irene

Comment on Many Couples Give Up Without Really Trying by Stephen Knezek,RN,LCSW

Stephen Knezek,RN,LCSW — Tue, 07 Sep 2010 00:31:42 +0000

I have been conducting couple’s counseling for a long time and I am married for 44 years. Most of the couples that come to me wait until they are in a profound crisis and feeling hopeless. The first intervention is to calm the crisis down and help them to gain some perspective. This reduces the strain between them and helps them to get into a problem solving state of mind.

The second intervention is help them to grow in their ability to appreciate one another. To say out loud the things that they are both doing but not getting credit for.

Most couples at some point start taking one another for granted and take the good things that the other does as an expectation, not something to be appreciated.

In my 35 years in the mental health field, I have never had a more challenging form of therapy to condcut than couple’s counseling. This is true whether someone is married or not, straight or gay, bi-sexual, lesbian, transgender or queer.

Comment on Facebook and the Green-eyed Monster by B. Scott

B. Scott — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 11:47:57 +0000

Loving the content. Everything is on point and I couldn’t help but consider how this parallels my life, especially how FACEBOOK is such a big thing to my wife and I. Thank you.

Comment on Stress on Marriages and Relationships – This Economy by Lynn

Lynn — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 02:20:48 +0000

I will try my best to make it 5 to 1. Thanks for your suggestion.

Comment on Relationship Red Flags by Lynn

Lynn — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 02:18:11 +0000

Thanks for the wake up article. I see that those signs can not be ignored.

Comment on Healthy Families by Marlene

Marlene — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 22:04:22 +0000

I love this. I printed it to have on hand.

Comment on Never Assume, Never Expect by Marlene

Marlene — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 22:02:45 +0000

This has always been a bit difficult for me in a relationship.
I sometimes feel my partner should understand me better, even if I haven’t communicated it in words, especially when it has been a long relationship.

Comment on Keeping Your Balance on the Tightrope by Mirjana

Mirjana — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 21:34:53 +0000

I think this is a really helpful post, however, sometimes I feel like my actions in my present relationship are residual behaviors from the previous one(s). Do you have any suggestions on how to counteract this? I also sometimes feel like it isn’t ok, or it is taboo, to discuss my old relationships, and the significant problems that came up in my old relationships, with my new partners. I wonder if there is a good way to do this in order to prevent the same problems and conflicts that arose in past relationships from appearing in the new one.