Another Quick Communication Fix

So many couples find themselves embroiled in a heated argument that could have been easily avoided by being mindful of how the communication is working.  When there are underlying misunderstandings and incorrect assumptions each person gets focused on the injustice of the situation at hand and how unfairly they are being treated.  This can often . . . → Read More: Another Quick Communication Fix

The Economy and Relationships

An article in the  New York Times article, Husbands-Wives-Hard-Times a few months ago during the depths of the recession polled 5 authorities on their opinions about how this difficult economic climate was affecting relationships. Of course the economy takes its toll on relationships as all  environmental stressors do. But as one of the experts noted, . . . → Read More: The Economy and Relationships

Relationship Red Flags

A recent book by M. Gary Neuman, summarizes a lot of theories about infidelity in relationships In The Truth About Cheating, Mr. Neuman analyzes the hows and whys of men’s infidelity. According to Mr. Neuman, the following are signs that can be red flags that there may be a problem in your marriage.

1. He . . . → Read More: Relationship Red Flags

Study Shows Communication is Key

A recent study by Arthur Aron, Ph.D sites 2 key elements in long-time happy relationships – good communication even when there is conflict and doing new things together. Introducing new activities helps create a feeling of novelty that can sometimes be missing in longtime relationships.

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Love and Brain Chemistry

There’s a interesting post on web MD which explains the changes in brain chemistry when one is “in love”. The rise in dopamine and serotonin that contribute to the feelings of well-being can alternate with the release of the stress hormone, cortisol, explaining the up and down mood changes. One of the researchers states that . . . → Read More: Love and Brain Chemistry

The Overwhelming Hurt of Infidelity

Many clients contact me after they’ve found out that their partner or spouse has been unfaithful. This is obviously a very difficult and painful time. Most clients say that it’s the most difficult challenge they’ve had to face. There is such a flood of emotions and the person who used to provide support is the . . . → Read More: The Overwhelming Hurt of Infidelity

Easy Skill for Quick Relationship Repair

Real relationships go through cycles of harmony, disconnection and repair. Hopefully those cycles will become gentle slopes and not peaks and valleys as partners learn the skills of relationship repair. One essential skill is communicating relationally where the intention is, not just expressing your point of view, but repairing a disconnect with your partner. The . . . → Read More: Easy Skill for Quick Relationship Repair

What is Resiliance Made of Of?

Someone suggested that it would be valuable to write about the hard ecomonic climate we’re all facing. In thinking on this subject I started with the basic concept that informs a lot of my work – that there are events in life (what life throws at us) and the way we react to . . . → Read More: What is Resiliance Made of Of?

Is Diminishing Sex Drive a Problem?

When couples lose their sexual connection it often has a negative impact on the relationship. This slideshow on webMD lists many of the reasons that you or your partner’s sexuality can be diminished. If you understand the cause for a problem it helps in exploring options for rectifying it.

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Learning How to Communicate

Many therapists, myself included, work with couples on learning to respond to your partner in a way that increases empathy, understanding and connection. But there’s a biological reason why we can sometimes be acting as the most reasonable, understanding person in the world and our partner can feel emotionally triggered ie. experiencing unpleasant emotions in . . . → Read More: Learning How to Communicate